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Thursday, April 28, 2016

I think it's through this blog that you can really tell how I've grown.
I may be slow in growing or maybe to some, fast, but I've definitely not remained the same.
Haha, I wonder is anybody still actually reading this blog? :)
How do I stick to the habit of blogging everyday?
Cause I STILL think that blogging and writing my feelings out will help me a lot.
I have a lot of things in mind and I believe that venting it out here will be much better than cultivating all these negative thoughts and emotions in my mind.
Most of the time I forget I have a place to let them out but a lot of times I am just lazy and I end up damaging myself.
If you've noticed, these past few years I've just been writing everything out very vaguely.
In comparison to the year 2009, I wrote everything out from what I do everything to how I feel about everything and I sort of miss that.
I guess I'm just afraid of people judging me when they read this but why should that stop me from expressing myself? Am I right....hahaaa...

So recently I just got discharged from the hospital because I had my appendix removed.
It was swelling for the whole day and when I went to a clinic, the doctor referred me to the hospital to check and they said the signs were that of someone having appendicitis.
That night itself i underwent surgery because it was painful.
I used to look down on appendicitis because it's quite commonly discussed. By looking down I mean that I felt that it was just something common and nothing to worry about but damn was the pain real.
Even after surgery it was so painful. The anesthetics wore off and when I woke up I immediately felt the pain and tears just came out. The nurse gave me painkillers but it was still a little painful.
I couldn't move at all for that night and the next day but I had to try.
I needed to pee so I tried to go to the toilet and it was really suffering because I couldn't breathe properly and it was hurting so much. That was 6 days ago, I am much better now. I can stand and walk but still really slowly and I can't actually stand upright.
I'd like to truly thank all the people who were with me throughout that experience. I am so so grateful to all of you who helped me. Thank you so much.

Because of this, I missed pretty much a lot of classes and I'm currently behind on a lot of things.
I'm quite stressed out because I've no clue how to do what I'm supposed to do and I don't really know where to start. Maybe it's just because I'm panicking and I really wished I knew how to take the first step. I've a lot of things due just next week and that's probably why I feel like I can't relax although I need to recover.
I was trying to figure out how to transfer the data that I have from excel to SPSS but now here I am typing all this cause I felt the need to rant haha.

Okay byeee, till the next time.