An update on life.

:3

Hi dear blog :')

It's been a very long time and since i'm free now, i'll write you a very summarized summary on what is currently going on in my life.

I have escaped the depths of USJ8 and am currently expanding my education in Sirius Scholar, Ace Edventure.

Yes I am form 5 this year but i'm not taking SPM. I am going to sit for IGCSE and no, it's not easy for even getting a C means you are top 40% of the world. That means the rest of the 60% taking the test fails. So yeah, good luck to me there.

I have met many new friends as well and I wish i could name all of you but there are too many and i'm afraid that i'll accidentally leave some of you out. You guys know who you are. :)

I have strongly bonded with my classmates, 4 Onyx class of 2011, 5 Onyx class of 2012.

We're like one big family and i love them. :)

Not only them, but others too from different classes and forms. Not to mention the teachers there as well. They are part of the reason why my schooling days are awesome.

I have recently started ice skating again but only for a short while because I'll be performing(a bigg group performance) with all my friends whom i've not seen for a very long time.

I am very grateful and happy to be able to see them again and skate alongside them.

I am still making singing covers as I still am passionate about singing. As i stepped foot at Sirius Scholar, I met many people who share the same interest and are probably more devoted to music than I'll ever be.

Because of them, I gathered a lot of experience and i'm gonna level up soon! har har har, laugh with me c'mon. :D

I am still gaming a whole lot.

I started playing more FPS games than MMORPG.

Maybe it's cause majority is playing FPS games now. Or it's because they have better graphics and story lines and all you do in MMORPG games is grind.

That's pretty much it for now, I'll update again next time.

Cheerio.

Love,

Elayne.

Unveiled thoughts.

I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing that's true.

xx.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

To witness the smiles of your dear ones enhances your day an awful lot :)

To be able to laugh sincerely and feel once again, happiness growing from the heart.

They are the ones who mysteriously hold the power to uncage my emotions, the ones whom i'll never get tired of.

I am a blessed girl to have friends like these.

In case you guys can't tell, I miss the time we spent together, fortunate or unfortunate events, happy or sad, good or bad, every moment has been inscribed on my heart and I guess you lot really left footprints all over me.

Thanks a bunch of roses, really, for spending today with me.

These are friends you will never want to replace and I can't wait to meet up with the rest. :)

Love,

Elayne.

For somebody that I used to know.

forgotten memories.

Your rippling images remain as nothing but silhouettes in my unspoken dreams.

Each glance represents the remnants of emotions in my inhabited heart, triggering reminiscence of the dreadful but valuable time spent.

The cold atmosphere around us is not brought by the weather but simply by the presence of a lost soul trying to surpass a level of awkwardness.

The sight of your smirk, slowly lengthening from ear to ear flashes across my vision every now and then, undulating and disappearing from my conscience but not my shielded heart.

My barrier, strengthened by a long-lasting hope shining from the above that truthfully signified nothing but a sign to advance towards another direction, an unseen path.

Pools have been inevitably forming whenever I catch a glimpse of you and seeing you makes it harder to suppress the containment in my heart's core.

Every breath becomes heavier as the icy atmosphere takes over, freezing my every movement.

My tongue gets tied and puts me at loss for words.

I am like a statuette that is always unnoticed.

The weight of this situation continues to rest on my shoulders as i put myself in jeopardy.

How did an emotion that warms your heart turn into something that helps you bleed inside?

Has the fire in your heart depleted? Must I conjure it again?

Elayne.

Life.

Entry 1.

Everytime i think of you, you remind me of how karma works. What goes around, comes around.
True, it is. But you only hurt for a couple of months and i've been hurting for years.
How does that seem fair?
Maybe it is.
Some people say when you do something bad to a person, you'll be punished 12 times worst.
So maybe this is the punishment i'm getting for being such a mean person to you.
but to tell you the truth, I ended it as soon as i could for i know that you deserve better.
I really loved you from the bottom of my heart but knowing i'm not good enough for you, I had a crucial decision to make.
If i had ever continued, then only will I be the bad person.
I see you found happiness, i'm really happy for you, that's all i can say.
Now after years, i have to move on to the next chapter, to find my happiness and forget about you.

Entry 2.

I never thought that this would ever happen to me but first time in my life, i've been played like a fool.
I followed your cries like a blind man would and was slowly hypnotized into your play box, figuring I was your favourite toy at least. I was never more wrong in my life.
Knowing I'm the idiot i already am, I still let you play with me because i loved how you would imagine me as the girl of your dreams, the girl you would exchange vows with someday.
Although I secretly dream of being that girl, I knew that you would never think of a worn out toy like me, for after all, i am only a toy.

Entry 3.

I hear cries every night, from outside my hole. And when i peeked out, all I can see is a cheese.
Its wonderful scent that one can't resist, tried to lure me out from the only safe spot i know of.
I tried my hardest to not be bothered by its nature, but i can't ignore such a brilliant creation.
And when i reached out for it, I felt pain crawling up my tail.
That's when i realized, I was blinded by lies.

Y U NO

Lost.

Why hate? when you start hating, a vision will be blocked. A vision of a good side.

It'll all be dark and gloomy, everything you see of it will be black and nothing more.

Stop hating, start loving, you will be able to see the good side of things and clear out the fog and clouds that you were once hiding under.

Dreams? Why does my dream seem sooo impossible.. ? Why did God let me meet a competition who is far better than me? Is it to show and tell me that i should give up because there are way more talented ppl out there in this world? Or is it to help me become better at it than i alrdy am? Honesly, i never really thought that my dream is something that I could ever achieve. I have NO belief in it.

Im not looking down on myself, it's because i KNOW that some things are just impossible, not EVERYTHING is possible no matter how hard you try to believe. Not only that, i also know that im not good enough and i will never be.

For the future, i don't really know what to do. i LOVE science but not as much as i love music. I love discovering new things too but there is not one thing that i know of that i REALLY REALLY LOVE doing. Why is it this way? i want to know what i love doing. and secondly, i want to know what im really talented in. Like what everybody says, everyone has a gift. What is mine? its frustrating that i have yet to discover it but if i alrdy have discovered it.. then i really am not talented enough for the talented.. if you get what i mean..

stupid.

Just wanna let you know that you're so stupid.

youre so stupid that you dont even know that youre stupid.

everyone keeps telling you that youre stupid but you wont listen because youre stupid.

how stupid can you get, stupid?

i dont think you can even understand the term stupid.

dont be so stupid, but you are stupid.

you dont even have to act stupid to be stupid.

you try to act smart but you are so stupid.

i hope you know how stupid you are because if you dont see that youre stupid, you will always be stupid.

im so sorry because youre so stupid.

it's probably your fault for being so stupid.

well i guess it cant be help since you are so stupid.

if life is sad for you , its because you're stupid.

no words can describe how stupid you are.

thats why im updating a post on your stupidity.

i hope you read and learn that you are so stupid.

if you finally realise that you're so stupid,

you better buy me ice cream cause it is not stupid.

but you probably wont, because you're so stupid.

because of the amount of stupid typed here, i even forgot bout the word for awhile.

With much, extra love,

Elayne.